A Guest Post on Motherhood Fears

This is my first time hosting a guest post, but I just have to share the thoughts of my friend Kim, who talked about the scary parts of motherhood so eloquently! Here is what she had to say:

There is just so much about becoming a mom that is scary.

Some people feel like they can lose their identity.  It’s hard becoming a mom for the first time, especially if you’re the first of your friends to do so.  Friendships don’t necessarily disappear overnight, but you start to slowly realize that as you become a mom, single friends without kids just start to slowly back off.  Not that they want to leave you behind, but sometimes, it’s harder to relate, and sometimes, those friends can feel isolated as well.  So, we’re scared when we first become a mom because who we once were, those people we loved so much, it all seems to start to disappear.

What if I get it wrong?  I mean, how can you not have anxiety about caring for and raising another human being.  And when you go out to the store and see the frazzled mom whose kid is throwing a major tantrum in the middle of aisle 3, all you can think is “oh my god, what if that happens to me?  What am I going to do?  Look at the way everyone is staring at her.”  And, as much contempt as we have for those mom’s before we have kids, once we’re pregnant we wonder if that’s going to be us and how can we stop it.  In short…..you can’t.  It is inevitable.  No matter what you do, how well you raise your child, anything…..one day, you will have that child in the middle of aisle 3 and you will be that frazzled mom.  And, that’s scary.

There are a million and one scary things about becoming a mom.  And the truth is, those scary things never go away.  You will always doubt yourself.  You will always compare yourself to other mom’s.  Not because you will think you’re better than them, but because you will wonder what they are doing right that you aren’t.  The truth is…..NOTHING!!!!

At the end of the day….when you are that frazzled mom in aisle 3, when you screamed at your child for the first time and have broken down and cried after vowing to NEVER be THAT mom, when you’ve given them ice cream for dinner because you can’t manage to find the energy to cook an actual meal that day, when you doubt every fiber in your being that you’re a good mom…..remember this………

This…..right here…..This is what it’s all about.  Because, at the end of the day, no matter how much I’ve messed up….these kids love me unconditionally, and tomorrow is a new day 🙂  So, yes, motherhood is scary…..but it is a million times worth it

Kim with her first born, Corbin.

Kim with her first born, Corbin.

And with her daughter, Marlee.

And with her daughter, Marlee.

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