The Shower

It went off without a hitch.

Desperate to wash my hair and shave my legs, I dragged the baby swing into my bathroom. I brought an already sleeping baby boy and buckled him in. He stirred for a few seconds, and then settled back into a deep sleep. Breathing a sigh of relief, I proceeded to take a long, hot shower. I got everything clean, and Leah only came in a couple of times with various issues.

I got out and although Chris was squeaking, he was still asleep. I even had time to moisturize! I put on mascara, combed my hair, and put on clothes out of my closet rather than off of the floor or my pajama drawer. I felt like a million bucks!

The baby was awake now, but it didn’t matter because I was all done, feeling cleaner and better than I had in days. I picked him up, kissed his chubby cheeks, and fed him.

And then he spit up all over me. The end!

One of Those Moms

Christopher is an excellent nurser. Not only does he have the latch down, but he eats a lot at one time, and quite frequently as well. Meeting that demand is not always easy, but it is so worth it. I also love the bonding part of the experience. With Leah, breastfeeding was such a stressful experience that I never really got to enjoy that aspect of it.

Part of being a mom is feeding your baby- whenever and wherever you happen to be when he gets hungry. Although I am a very modest woman, I find myself becoming one of those moms, you know the ones who will nurse anywhere. So far, I have fed Chris at the doctor’s office, in the ER (long story, but we’re all okay), and even in my car in the Target parking lot. I cover up as much as I can, but I will not let my baby cry in hunger because I am too afraid that someone may catch a glimpse of my breast, or worse yet, because someone with hang-ups may be offended.

The purpose of breastfeeding is to feed your child. It is not ever about proving a point- nor should it be. If there is an appropriate and discreet place to nurse I will find it. If not, I will make do with a cover. I am not going to whip my boob out in the middle of a restaurant just because I can, and I do not want anyone to buy me a pizza to thank me. I am simply feeding my baby.

So yes, I am one of those moms. Now quit staring and mind your own business.

What is THAT?

Well, it happened. I knew it was coming.

Being that Leah was an only child with no boy cousins that she has been close enough with to share a bath, she had no idea that boys had different genitalia than girls. Until her brother was born, that is.

Dave was the one changing him when Leah leaned over and exclaimed, “What is THAT?”

In typical Dave fashion, he just told her it is where her brother’s pee comes from. So, enter me, completely unaware of what had gone down, doing the next diaper change.

“Mom,” Leah informed me, “I saw that big lump the baby has that he pees out of.”

“Big lump?” I asked, laughing. “That is his boy parts. Boys and girls are different.”

“Oh!” Leah said, having an epiphany. She turned to Dave, “So Daddy, you have one of those, too?”

Dave looked like he wanted to melt into the floor, but he nodded.

“So THAT’S why you stand up to pee!” she said excitedly. “Is yours bigger than Chris’?”

At that point we changed the subject!

Just Pretending

If you read my blog on a regular basis then you will know that Leah was not entirely on board about becoming a big sister. And by not on board, I mean she was totally pissed off about it. She told anyone who asked that she was not excited and would not help with the new baby when he came. Dave and I were left feeling quite nervous about her reaction when he was actually here.

My Mom brought Leah to the hospital first thing in the morning after he was born. At that point she was mostly indifferent, but a couple of times she checked him out, and even counted his little piggies. That night my Dad and Stepmom brought her back again, but this time she had had a full day of being spoiled by grandparents and was exhausted and cranky. She lashed out at Dave, would not come near me, and really wanted nothing to do with her brother. I was slightly disheartened, but I also knew she was over-tired.

The following night I was discharged from the hospital and my Dad brought Leah home to us. I was surprised when she came right over and started talking to Christopher in a soft voice and remarking on how little he is. My dad whispered to me that he got her to agree to “pretend” to love the baby so that mommy wouldn’t be sad. I know it sounds bad, but it was actually pretty brilliant. It plays to her stubbornness and gives her an out. She can love her brother and bond with him without having to admit that she was wrong.

That night she held Chris for the first time. She was still pretty exhausted, but she sat proudly with him in her arms and I saw the look on her face- pure love! My heart leapt with joy as I looked upon my two children, the two best things that have ever happened to me, together at last. And then Leah looked up at me and said sweetly, “By the way, mom, I am just pretending to love this.”

Since then Leah asks to hold her brother quite often. She rubs his head, talks to him in her singsong voice, and lets him wrap his little bitty hand around her finger. And every couple of days she reminds me that she is “just pretending”. I am okay with that. I will take what I can get, and I am so proud of what a great big sister she is turning out to be. She has her moments where she feels sad and jealous, but she tells me and (remember I am still hormonal) we have a little cry together, and then she goes on her merry way of being Leah.

The most beautiful moment of my life other than the births of both my babies was the other day when Christopher was on one shoulder and Leah was in my lap. She was rubbing the baby’s head and she told me, “I love him all the way from here down to his toes.” Yup, my heart feels complete!

Big Sis "pretending" to love on her baby brother!

Big Sis “pretending” to love on her baby brother!

Introducing Christopher William

Christopher arrived on January 9th at 2:27 a.m. I was supposed to be induced later that morning, but on Wednesday evening I went into labor on my own after a small dose of Cervidil. After walking the hallways of the maternity ward for an hour, my water broke on it’s own and everything went quickly from there! I got to do a full hour of skin to skin and nurse before they even measured or weighed the baby, and let me tell you, that was absolutely amazing and I would recommend it to any mother who is able.

Here are some pictures of my precious boy! I will update on Leah so6on, but she is doing great as well.

Christopher William: 8lbs. 0.6oz., 20.5″

Already in love.

Already in love.

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Daddy and son, checking each other out.

Daddy and son, checking each other out.

Perfection.

Perfection.

The Big Day!

Most of my regular readers know that I am pregnant with my second child, a baby boy who we are naming Christopher William. I apologize that I have not written much lately, but I have been very pregnant, haha! Meaning, cranky, irritable, and just too darn tired!

Anyway, I wanted to let you all know that I am scheduled to be induced on Thursday (January 9th). I will be 39 weeks, 4 days. I will likely be quiet for a bit longer as I adjust to having two children and to sleep deprivation, but I will also be gathering up tons of new material to write about as motherhood takes another beautiful twist for me. I will update as soon as I can, and I will get back into the swing of keeping you all up to date on my adventures!

Love to you all until next time! ❤